
But he answered his father, “Listen! For all these years I have been working like a slave for you, and I have never disobeyed your command; yet you have never given me even a young goat so that I might celebrate with my friends. But when this son of yours came back, who has devoured your property with prostitutes, you killed the fatted calf for him!”
–Luke 15:29-30–
That quote is from one of the most famous stories in The Bible known as “The Prodigal Son.” It’s always been one of my favorites. The majority of those who know this story consider it an example of how a parent always forgives a child. While that is a piece of the story, it is only one layer in the parable.
When I first read that story, in Sunday school, I could immediately relate…not to the son who was so lovingly accepted back by his father, but to the elder son who was so angry and hurt by his father’s actions. I was always a “good girl,” doing everything I could to please my own parents, and I, too, witnessed my father’s attention and forgiveness lavished on the child who did anything possible to be everything he didn’t want. I had been the one to look after him and I had done my best to please him, but the instant my sister came home, I was invisible and unappreciated. It seemed so unjust, and many were the nights I cried myself to sleep over it. Like the elder son in the story, I was deeply hurt by my father’s actions.
In the story, the father responds to the elder son, saying:
“Son, you are always with me, and all that is mine is yours. But we had to celebrate and rejoice, because this brother of yours was dead and has come to life; he was lost and has been found.”
That wasn’t exactly what I wanted to hear. When I read the father’s reply to the elder son, I was even more furious! What? You feel we should reward the son who betrayed you and celebrate his return. But what about me? I’m the one who’s always been here for you! Don’t I deserve more than he does? Shouldn’t you love me the most?
As I grew up, I started to find new meaning in the parable. I understood that “the father” was more than a human being. It was God. God was demonstrating unconditional love and forgiveness. I now realized Divine Love isn’t exclusive. It doesn’t have favorites. For the first time, I recognized The Parent in the story, and being a parent myself, I could understand how joyful it is to see a lost child return. Loving one does not mean the other is loved any less. The younger son chose to accept the love sporadically, but the elder son was bathed in consistent love. The love being offered by The Father was continuous and equal…it was the children who were the variables. One son lived in acceptance, while the other sometimes denied it. As parents, we tend to love different aspects in each of our children–but the love is the same for all of them. As children, we want our parents to especially notice our uniqueness. We long to be the favorite and we crave our parents’ undivided attention.
It was the ego–the pain-body–whose jealous nature cried out in protest in both the elder son and in myself. Insecure in feeling loved, the inner child begs for more attention. “Look at me!” it cries. Because that child took on the idea that he/she had to compete for love, it became necessary for one to be less than the other. Superiority feeds the ego…insures its survival. The ego loves to compete with others, because that sense of separation keeps it alive and well. But, wait a minute, perhaps I should be happy The Father welcomed home the one who betrayed him!
Asking “The Father” to love one child more than the other is asking in vain, because there are not two children. It isn’t possible, because God is not in one or the other…God is in one and the other. The prodigal son and the elder son are coming from the same identity. They are nothing more than opposing aspects of Self. We are both of them. Sometimes we abide by the rules and serve The Father with respect, but other times we go astray, casting our pearls before swine, while denying our holy nature. The Father, however, welcomes us unconditionally…never wavers from offering us all good. Love resides in the field of All That Is, and is available to every one in every moment. We decide to accept it or to resist it. Sometimes we are open to Love, and during those times, we are full and overflowing. We have nothing to add to who we are, because we are All That Is. Sometimes we forget and we falter. However, when one who has been resisting comes back into oneness, we have to celebrate and rejoice that awakening. That return to oneness is a gift to us, because it empowers the whole. What happens to the least of us happens to all of us. We are One. It is not the younger brother returning to the Father, it is the part of myself I’ve denied being recognized with new eyes. Once I see it for what it is, I can forgive….not others, only myself.
In reality, there is only One of us. The younger son is part of the elder son, and vice versa. The celebration is for both of them, because they are one in the same, and they have seen themselves in one another. There is never any need to compete with “others,” because all are reflections of the whole. No one is loved more…and no one is loved less. Everything is Love and is loved. In taking away the us versus them mentality, we flourish.
As Eckhart Tolle writes in A New Earth:
“The stronger the ego, the stronger the sense of separateness between people. The only actions that do not cause opposing reactions are those that are aimed at the good of all. They are inclusive, not exclusive. They join; they don’t separate. They are not for ‘my’ country but for all of humanity, not for ‘my’ religion but the emergence of consciousness in all human beings, not for ‘my’ species but for all sentient beings and all of nature.”
Come. Let us celebrate our brothers’ return!
I AM…Jodi
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